Well it's been a while since my last post, been rather busy of late.
Last weekend we had the 'first' party of the Barrington party season, It was a much smaller than usual afair (I needed to see how I would handle it) but great all the same. Loved all the outfits, it was so much fun getting everything together it's now got me in the mood to have many more this year! Plans for the Wild West Extravaganza are well underway.
It was Chris and Jenni's wedding yesterday and what a lovely wedding it was. Can't believe Jenni made all that bunting! It was beautiful all of it. So lovely to see them together and the speak Chris made bought tears to my eyes (I cry through most of it I must admit). I even lasted until 11 o'clock (I did suffer with tummy ache from about 7 though, but of of the villagers fetched me a hot water bottle). Paul and I even had a couple of dances.
Since my last post we (thats me and my sisters) have also been interviewed by Cancer Reasearch UK as they are focusing on lung cancer awareness this year and have been in all the local papers.
Got a busy month ahead now! Going to 'Australia' next weekend lol well 'Australia' in a field near Nottingham. For the Kangaroo Doo courtesy of lovely friend Chris and family. Then off to York staright after for a couple of days. We don't need to go at the weekend we have all week and it was cheaper! lol.
Sunday, 26 June 2011
Saturday, 11 June 2011
Saturday 11th
Whilst in Cornwall I was contacted by the hospital (xray dept) and given an appointment for a CT scan for last Friday. I was a bit taken aback and concerned as my oncologist had said 2-3 months for the first scan to see if the treatment is working and this was only 6 weeks! My emossions were all over the place as 'what if they were scanning me too soon for the treatment to be working' and subsequently the treatment would be stopped! I was even more concerned and annoyed when I found out that pharmacy had asked for the scan as the treatment was 'expensive'!!!
Low and behold I went for the scan and on tuesday I found out that not only was the treatment working but the tumour had shrunk from 11cms to 8.5cms in only 6 weeks! It makes the spots and rashes all worth it. There will now be no question to me continuing with the treatment and my next scan is 3 months time.
I have also found (and joined) a forum calles 'Inspire' there are lots of people on there who are living with and surviving lung cancer even with advanced inoperable lung cancer like me. All of this has really given me hope and for the first time since this happened I feel that I can actually feel excited about life and not feel flat as I have been.
I am trying to cut the morphine down and hope that in the next couple of weeks I will be off it completely! That will be great news for my bowels!
Got a busy few weeks ahead now! Wedding reception tonight (congratualtions Dave & Andrea) Punk Party next saturday (need to figure out how to upload photo's on here!) Chris and Jenni's wedding the week after (Paul is best man xx) and then off to York to stay in a posh hotel the week after that! Then amongst all this I will be trying to find a nice holiday for Paul and me to go on straight after my next oncology and chemo appt! No chance of my retirement becoming boring!
Low and behold I went for the scan and on tuesday I found out that not only was the treatment working but the tumour had shrunk from 11cms to 8.5cms in only 6 weeks! It makes the spots and rashes all worth it. There will now be no question to me continuing with the treatment and my next scan is 3 months time.
I have also found (and joined) a forum calles 'Inspire' there are lots of people on there who are living with and surviving lung cancer even with advanced inoperable lung cancer like me. All of this has really given me hope and for the first time since this happened I feel that I can actually feel excited about life and not feel flat as I have been.
I am trying to cut the morphine down and hope that in the next couple of weeks I will be off it completely! That will be great news for my bowels!
Got a busy few weeks ahead now! Wedding reception tonight (congratualtions Dave & Andrea) Punk Party next saturday (need to figure out how to upload photo's on here!) Chris and Jenni's wedding the week after (Paul is best man xx) and then off to York to stay in a posh hotel the week after that! Then amongst all this I will be trying to find a nice holiday for Paul and me to go on straight after my next oncology and chemo appt! No chance of my retirement becoming boring!
Sunday, 5 June 2011
Sunday 5th June
A lovely peaceful quiet Sunday morning....boy do I need the rest. We haven't stopped since we got back from cornwall. Just been for my Sunday morning walk with Victoria and am having 5 minutes writing this blog and watching Gok before going to the shop to buy bits for paul to cook Sunday lunch!
The week away has done me the world of good....I feel much calmer (not that I wasn't quite cam anyway) I don't feel ill although I don't feel the same as before. I feel that I can look forward to things and get excited about things and not feel as 'flat' as I did before. I almost feel back to normal as far as having a life is concerned, I just haven't got as much energy yet!
I am also now officially retired!!!! Not by choice (I wasn't ready for it yet) by neccessity! haven't got any money yet though, It's going to take 2-3 weeks! As soon as it comes I'm booking a holiday abroad for me and Paul and going shopping! I've always wanted to go on a spree with £2000 as per Trinny and Suzanna so I'm going to do it lol!
Just waiting now for a decision on the life insurance, then It will be full steam ahaed to finnish the extension and Paul and I can just get on with enjoying life together and loving each other.
The week away has done me the world of good....I feel much calmer (not that I wasn't quite cam anyway) I don't feel ill although I don't feel the same as before. I feel that I can look forward to things and get excited about things and not feel as 'flat' as I did before. I almost feel back to normal as far as having a life is concerned, I just haven't got as much energy yet!
I am also now officially retired!!!! Not by choice (I wasn't ready for it yet) by neccessity! haven't got any money yet though, It's going to take 2-3 weeks! As soon as it comes I'm booking a holiday abroad for me and Paul and going shopping! I've always wanted to go on a spree with £2000 as per Trinny and Suzanna so I'm going to do it lol!
Just waiting now for a decision on the life insurance, then It will be full steam ahaed to finnish the extension and Paul and I can just get on with enjoying life together and loving each other.
Tuesday, 31 May 2011
May 31st
Been in Cornwall now for 8 days. Spend the first 4 with Adam ,Gemma, Duncan, Cardice and the children in Newquay. Whilst we were there managed to catch up with my lovely friend Jaki who now lives there.
We carried our journey on to Cabris Bay to stay with Alyson and Neil. Alyson is my old RAF friend I have now been firnds with for 30+ years. They live in a beautiful house with a perfect sea view. What a lovely time this has been, we have seen so many lovely beaches I can't believe are in the UK and even been to Lands end and dressed up as pirates! The pirates then moved on to Porthmeor and recreated the Skeggy picture fro 30 years ago (whe we were in the RAF)drinking wine from sandcastle buckets through straws lol.
I have to say though that I am now shattered and am in need of a rest!
Had a phone call whilst we were here from Xray dept telling me I have to have a scan on Friday to check the treatment is working before I see the onchologist in order for the treatment I am on to continue. I will only have been taking it for 7 weeks by then so I hope that it is showing that it is working as if not I have to revert to traditional chemo. I don't know whether I will be able to stand all the side effects or if it it worth it to have more time but not be able to enjoy it. I don't feel too good now - well not today anyway.
We carried our journey on to Cabris Bay to stay with Alyson and Neil. Alyson is my old RAF friend I have now been firnds with for 30+ years. They live in a beautiful house with a perfect sea view. What a lovely time this has been, we have seen so many lovely beaches I can't believe are in the UK and even been to Lands end and dressed up as pirates! The pirates then moved on to Porthmeor and recreated the Skeggy picture fro 30 years ago (whe we were in the RAF)drinking wine from sandcastle buckets through straws lol.
I have to say though that I am now shattered and am in need of a rest!
Had a phone call whilst we were here from Xray dept telling me I have to have a scan on Friday to check the treatment is working before I see the onchologist in order for the treatment I am on to continue. I will only have been taking it for 7 weeks by then so I hope that it is showing that it is working as if not I have to revert to traditional chemo. I don't know whether I will be able to stand all the side effects or if it it worth it to have more time but not be able to enjoy it. I don't feel too good now - well not today anyway.
Sunday, 22 May 2011
Sunday 22nd May
2 months now since operation and diagnosis. Feel alot better, but still can't do stairs like I used to able to without getting out of breath, It's hard to get get breath back too when I get to the top as I can't get a deep breath in. It must be the operation though as I was OK before, it is quite frightening though, when will it get back to normal.
Felt a bit more enthusiastic today about planning things. I've found it hard to get enthusiastic about anything I just feel flat. I wat that enthusiasm back.
Paul and I are still in limbo with things. We still don't know where the next penny is coming from and his van broke down again on Friday, the mechanic doesn't know what's wrong with it. Parts have been replaced (at a cost!) but it still has the same problem.
We have some good friends who are trying to help us get this extension finished or at least get the downstairs bit done, however it needs money. I am so not used to not being able to go to work it makes me feel helpless and that's one thing I have never been, I need to earn money.
We are going away tomorrow though for a weeks break, I think Paul needs it more than me, it will give us chance to recharge our batteries as It's all ben a bit hectic of late. A few days by the sea seeing friends who I've not seen for ages will do us the world of good.
Felt a bit more enthusiastic today about planning things. I've found it hard to get enthusiastic about anything I just feel flat. I wat that enthusiasm back.
Paul and I are still in limbo with things. We still don't know where the next penny is coming from and his van broke down again on Friday, the mechanic doesn't know what's wrong with it. Parts have been replaced (at a cost!) but it still has the same problem.
We have some good friends who are trying to help us get this extension finished or at least get the downstairs bit done, however it needs money. I am so not used to not being able to go to work it makes me feel helpless and that's one thing I have never been, I need to earn money.
We are going away tomorrow though for a weeks break, I think Paul needs it more than me, it will give us chance to recharge our batteries as It's all ben a bit hectic of late. A few days by the sea seeing friends who I've not seen for ages will do us the world of good.
Thursday, 19 May 2011
Thursday 19th May
Another milestone reached today, I had a bath without the bath lift! lol.
Appointments again this week, bloods Monday, chemo Tuesday and clinical psychology today, bloods must have been ok as I got to carry on with the gefitinib (chemo). I am now extremely spotty, and it's quite painful. I look in the mirror in the morning to find at least 10 new ones! I can just about cover them up with make up but it is getting worse, the 'cover up' is becoming quite an art. I here that its a good thing though, it means the treatment could be working, won't know for sure until I get scanned again July/august. Fingers and everything else crossed.
I still can't believe it though..... I'm still trying to pretend it isn't happening- just keep getting reminders every time I go to the hospital, that makes me depressed- I just want to get back to how I was before the surgery, I think I'm getting there :))
I registered for the race for life this week with my sisters and daughter. My sister Sue told our story on the cancer research page and they now want to use us/it as an inspirational story to promote the event, were going to be in the paper!!! I hope they have photo shop! lol
Appointments again this week, bloods Monday, chemo Tuesday and clinical psychology today, bloods must have been ok as I got to carry on with the gefitinib (chemo). I am now extremely spotty, and it's quite painful. I look in the mirror in the morning to find at least 10 new ones! I can just about cover them up with make up but it is getting worse, the 'cover up' is becoming quite an art. I here that its a good thing though, it means the treatment could be working, won't know for sure until I get scanned again July/august. Fingers and everything else crossed.
I still can't believe it though..... I'm still trying to pretend it isn't happening- just keep getting reminders every time I go to the hospital, that makes me depressed- I just want to get back to how I was before the surgery, I think I'm getting there :))
I registered for the race for life this week with my sisters and daughter. My sister Sue told our story on the cancer research page and they now want to use us/it as an inspirational story to promote the event, were going to be in the paper!!! I hope they have photo shop! lol
Sunday, 15 May 2011
Sunday 15th May
Today, well for the last week I have looked like a spotty teenager, it gets worse by the day! But I am told it's a good thing, the oncologist said the people who have the skin reactions do best on the drug...so...bring it on 'spots', bring it on! I can cover you up with make up.
Feel a bit better today in myself, but I'm getting quite tired now in the afternoon and evening. My life is revolving round the morning as that's when I have the most energy. Also its the only time I don't need a hot water bottle for tummy cramps.
Form filling out seems to be a daily activity at the moment, can't wait to for a day when everything is sorted and we can just enjoy life. We are at a standstill at the mo as I'm still recovering form surgery and suffering the effects of chemo (I'm told they will settle down). I want to book a holiday and some weekends away, but we have no money (waiting for my pension and a decision on the life insurance) let alone trying to finish the extension, I don't want to die without seeing my dreams fulfilled. Everything is a battle but I'll fight as hard as I can.
Feel a bit better today in myself, but I'm getting quite tired now in the afternoon and evening. My life is revolving round the morning as that's when I have the most energy. Also its the only time I don't need a hot water bottle for tummy cramps.
Form filling out seems to be a daily activity at the moment, can't wait to for a day when everything is sorted and we can just enjoy life. We are at a standstill at the mo as I'm still recovering form surgery and suffering the effects of chemo (I'm told they will settle down). I want to book a holiday and some weekends away, but we have no money (waiting for my pension and a decision on the life insurance) let alone trying to finish the extension, I don't want to die without seeing my dreams fulfilled. Everything is a battle but I'll fight as hard as I can.
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